The 4-Plex

Living in a 4-plex has its ups and downs, pun intended. The revolving sets of neighbors, and the fact that someone lives over your head or under your feet all leads to some interesting occurrences. Not to mention we all have multiple pets. Currently living in the 4-plex we have:

The Ups, they have to be masons. Not the secret society kind but the real kind you know the ones that make stuff out of stone. Things like the shoes they wear all the time and the couch they love to move around the floor at all hours of the day and night. With everything they have made out of stone no wonder my ceiling is starting to cave in.

The two-faced bitch that’s past her prime, there is always one. She has lived here since the beginning of time and thinks she owns the building. Her favorite past time is smoking the god-awfullest smelling skunk weed. It stinks up the entire apartment building when she’s burnin one. The funniest thing is our landlord is one of Shadydale’s finest.

The newest neighbors, I call them the porch dwellers. They just moved in but have decided the buildings shared front porch is an extension of their apartment. You cannot even go outside and check the mail without having to step over or around them. I know they are the reason packages have been disappearing. Their favorite past time is sitting right up against my front door so that my dogs bark all day long alerting me to the neighbors lack of home training.

Then there’s me the crazy old lady. Every apartment building has to have one. You know her, she stays to herself, and you never see her except when she opens the door a crack to check her mail. You always wonder exactly what is she up to in there with all those packages being delivered on a daily basis. Is she a secret spy or just running a meth lab? Honey it’s just online shopping the best invention ever for us agoraphobes.

My daughter said this sounds like the back of a book.  Maybe it will be a series, we will see.

[irp]