Last night I watched this video “How to Forgive Yourself (The Secret and The POWER)” by Ralph Smart
This morning I woke up with this thought in my head.
What if you choose not to do better?
People say that part of letting go of the guilt of the past is forgiving yourself. Telling yourself you did the best you could at that moment in your life, that once you knew better you did better. What if you didn’t? What if once you knew better you chose to continue to do what you were doing because it was easier? You decided you didn’t want to change. You wanted to take the easy way out and just keep things the way they were. Then what? Is it now your fault that things happened because you took the easy way out? How do you forgive yourself then?
As a writer, I like to explore these questions of the soul. I would be interested in your thoughts on this topic – forgiveness, guilt, choice, and doing better.
Great question. I would tell my kids (2 teens, 2 early twenties) that if they make an unwise choice, they should not be surprised at a bad outcome. I also tell them that if they keep doing the same dumb thing over and over and expect a different outcome, that’s a sign of insanity.
I respectfully disagree with the “Know better, Do better” theory. There’s too much evidence that those who know better often do worse, and I think you’ve put your finger on the reason: we want to do what’s easy.
Guilt is hard to live with, but it is also a sign that there’s hope for improvement.
I think that if you want to point fingers and find fault, then, yes, you are responsible for your actions. How do you forgive yourself is a tougher question. If you truly are sorry, then ask for forgiveness to anyone you may have wronged, and show contrition with your actions now. We live in a time when everyone is so keen-eyed to find fault with one another, I think we all should practice some forgiveness, including self-forgiveness.
I too think that people are too often in a hurry to find fault in others. People seem to take offense now over the littlest of things.